When I got to her house we spent the afternoon talking about her experiences. She had a fascinating set of vivid sightings and events that seemed to indicate a lifetime of contact with the UFO phenomenon.
I took notes and I did a sketch of a craft with her guidance. I'll often admit that I am a crummy investigator, because all I ever seem to do is have a heart to heart conversation with a witness. I am NOT objective in the slightest, I get all emotionally wrapped up in their stories. I liked Tracy, and I thought she had a great outlook. I never did anything with the sketches or my notes.
Here's where it gets strange, I found something in my dairy. I do NOT remember ever writing this. I found it when I was digging through some old notes for the post above about two dreams in Alaska. This is another reassuring dream. I think I typed this into my lap-top computer the morning I woke up in Tracy's guest cabin.
July 14th 2008
I had a dream last night at Tracy’s house.
I remember I had a clear vision of several gray aliens. I was NOT subjected to any kind of fear. I was instead coming to terms with a sort of “normal” feeling, like they weren't so bad. Seeing them wasn’t out of the ordinary. It left me with the distinct impression that this was extremely calming, and in a way, reassuring.
I do NOT think there was any kind of abduction experience. Just a dream. But it fits the pattern of the two dreams in Alaska. Extremely vivid, and strangely orchestrated to be reassuring.
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4 comments:
I like the label you give to these dreams --reassuring.
It is as if something --your unconscious or maybe even something else is trying to help you get rid of your apprehensions.
Who knows. Maybe someday you'll discover that the 'block' Budd was unable to lift when he tried to hypnotize you has been finally lifted.
Maybe I should have included this in the post proper, but here goes:
All these *reassuring dreams* feel like a sort of projection from outside of myself. They FEEL like an implanted dream experience that is meant to calm me down - to REASSURE me.
I haven't had an experience like this in a few years, these dreams all seemed to cluster around that summer.
I think I know what I am implying. I have no other way to describe these than the way it feels.
Mike C
Sometimes I'll have an experience, and then I'll forget it (...wait. SOMETIMES!? I almost always forget most of it, if not all of it...)
But later I'll get oddly vivid dreams. They seem to revolve around whatever the abduction event revolved around-- at least what it involved for me personally.
Maybe-- just maybe you had an encounter where you realized it wasn't so bad, now that you were past the psychological shock of it. And while you forgot the actual event, your subconscious is still exploring all the ins and out of it.
Dreams from the outside... well, gosh, I can't discount anything. I'm not sure how that would work, but then I'm still asking myself about some of my weird dreams, so maybe it would be hypocritical of me to question it.
Regardless, I would take the dreams as a good omen, if only of your own comfort levels regarding facing this entire subject, let alone your own dealings with possible encounters. =^)
Sometimes I wonder if these memory blocks so often reported are not just a matter of a psychological subconscious issue of not being able to assess the full extent of the experience.
Sometimes I wonder... what if these experiences are not recorded by the brain because they were simply not experienced by your *physical* body?
What if they are stored in a part of 'You' that it's outside You?
This idea stems from my readings of CastaƱeda, and how by the last books it was slowly revealed that the whole point of the magical practice was to the practitioner to focus its will in order to conceive an energetic body strong enough to sustain the personality after the expiration of the biological body.
I don't know. It's one of the things I'm getting back to. This worry that life after death might not be a given.
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