the out-of-print self-published book
You can hear the shaky quality to his voice during this presentation. He seems fragile and uneasy. In the middle of this talk he sort of awkwardly says: "... and then I tried to end it all, and I found myself in a hospital." This dramatic remark says a lot about the intensity of his set of experiences.
I met John at the UFO conference where he made this unnerving presentation in 2008. My heart went out to the guy, he seemed deeply troubled by what had intersected with his life.